If so, you are what we call a "hobbyist." Well, I share your "hobby" and stand ready to consult with you for all your hobbyist needs, no matter how obscure. My consulting fees are as follows:
1. Quick thirty minute consultation: $150.
2. A 60 minute consultation: $300.
3. The Luke Ford Experience: this includes all of the above, plus dinner and a show, and me saying nice things about your cat(s). Cost: $650.
4. A weekend with Luke, wherever you choose (travel expenses extra, of course): $3,000.
For an extra $400, I throw in a special seminar, bare-bones.
Ladies, you know you've long wanted to get to know what I'm all about. This is your chance.