Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Frum Girls Seeking Boyfriends

Beverly Hills therapist Donna Burstyn blogs:

Today a young woman came into my office very courageous. The principal of her Jewish day school threatens to kick her out because she sees a boy.

My patient is 15. Her boyfriend is 17.

For those who don’t know, many Orthodox day schools prohibit mingling with the opposite sex. That means phone talks, walking down the street together, texting, emailing each other, befriending them on the social sites. The belief is that there is enough distraction going on for people of that age, their bodies are raging with hormones, and if you give a dog a bone, they’ll want to lick it all over.

This girl has been warned several times by the principal of her school.

I said, instead of warning her and having her sign a contract that she would sign because she wants to stay in school, why not think of a way of doing it differently so we’re not forcing her into lying?

Why don’t we understand what she’s getting out of this relationship?