Friday, July 31, 2009

Love in the Time of Pets

Khunrum emails: I could write an interesting short story on dating women with pets. The beasts always eye you like you're there to toss them in the stew pot. Women insist on sleeping with them. The litter box smells to high heaven. Fleas. A friend was doing the boom boom with a lady and her cat peed on his suit. Another chum was going at it on the couch when her dog trotted over and took a smelly dump right next to them. I was sleeping uncomfortably one evening when something crawled over my face. I thought it was a rat and woke up in mild terror. It was her cat. I got dressed and went home. You'd think a single gal would increase her chances of landing a guy by going petless until the poor bastard said "I DO". But no....they must have that dog or cat to sleep with. Thank G-d I married a lady from a country where dogs and cats could eventually end up on the barbeque spit. No pets in this house.